Three questions - many answers

These are questions that are being thrown out there with no expecations.. this is like me shouting at the ocean on Marina Beach in Madras during one of those bouts of extreme helplessness..

The ocean just absorbs my loudest scream so effortlessly. All I get in return is a local sense of calm as the waves lap my feet.

Maybe this post will give me that same feeling. Writing a post and putting it out there on the internet, is in a lot of ways like shouting at the waves. Not that these questions need answering, but putting them out there might give a sense of relief...

1. Is there any mother out there who can go on a polygraph and pass when asked the question "do you love your daughter-in-law as much as you love your daughter?" and she replies "Yes"? (assuming she is not an ex-CIA mom who was trained to beat a polygraph..)

2. Is it safe for any woman to be a homemaker? Are there that many trustworthy men in this world who can be counted on, or should I ask "are there that many trusting women out there? In today's world it is even more difficult for a home maker to find employment (or get employed again after a long break in employment) than it is for a working mom to adapt to being a stay at home mom. This comment is not being raised in the context of the man leaving the woman, but was sparked by thoughts along the lines of the man having poor health, falling sick constantly and by extension, being a prime candidate for disability or death, leaving the woman to take care of the family.

3. Do long distance relationships have a higher chance of failure? Does this higher chance hold true for blood relations also? Is physical proximity a requirement for a blood relationship like a grandparent, parent, child, sibling or are those bonds like the frienships you form in high school or college. You haven't talked to a person for a year and you call them on the phone and you just pick up where you left off.. there is always a welcome smile and open arms. Is it like that for blood relatives? Does "out of sight, out of mind" necessarily translate to "permanently out of mind"?

The neurons fire badly and erratically this week. Hay fever and tylenol allergy sinus may not have much to do with it. The questions keep bouncing inside the head and for some strange reason remind me of a computer game we used to play a long time ago called Jeezball. You box a bunch of bouncing balls into the smallest pockets only to realize that the more you box them in, the more difficult it is to contain them.

The waves might lap at my feet or the unseen Tsunami might throw me over. There are plenty of real and virtual moms, mothers in law around me, working at a home or office and the first two questions are not with respect to anyone in particular. As most or all of you know, I have given up trying to understand women. As long as they understand you, you are fine. Maybe Moses did not part the red sea.. the red sea parted for Moses, the red sea being a lot bigger and all.. same logic.

Question 3 is part of some soul searching.

Three questions, many answers, not necessarily right or wrong answers, just many many different answers!

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Happy mother's day

Wishing all moms out there tons of worthless trinkets from their school going kids,

as well as the real gifts..

the hugs and kisses!

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We pick up where we left off, with hopes that the trinkets, hugs and kisses would round up the day. There was more.

The day started off with a phone call to India that went from bad to worse in under 2 minutes and there was no turning back after that. On a scale of 1 to 10 we were at -5 by 10AM.

Even the roses in the livermore temple seemed to consipire. Pollen don't know its mothers day. Two moms were sad to see that I was trying my best to keep spirits high on the way back from livermore with a sneeze a minute and watering eyes. They told me "good job"! We were still below zero.

You try to make it up to one mommy too many and what have you? A row of unhappy moms. Finally a round of mini golf and a chirpy grocery shopping session with the girls ended the day in a positive note. That note was just above zero.

Sometimes cannot help think that if today had been just another sunday, it would have turned out much better.

Happy mothers day!

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Remoteless control

Today every TV comes with a remote. It is the default. Our three year old does NOT know that there is a power button on the TV which can be used as err.. "backup"!

Last week she was watching a kids DVD while eating dinner and when she finished her food, I told her to stop watching. She promptly took the remote and ran away. "how will you off it now?!" said the little tease and her face shrank when daddy casually walked past the TV on the wall, pressed a button on the side (she did not even see me press it) and the TV went "blink".. poor thing was devastated that she could not one up daddy.

Now, as usual this post is somehow steering to a remote when it should be going the other way..

The old TV in that photoblog, which seems to have stirred so many memories, has some appendages. A small box with a needle that keeps moving around 220V, called the voltage stablizer and an antenna on the terrace. A three pronged antenna mounted on the little parapet wall two floors above, connected to the TV below by a flat 1/2 inch black vinyl covered umbilical cord.

The TV had a rotary dial that went from 1 to 30 (if I remember right) and why 30 we do not know for there were only two channels! But you got the two channels to alternate in many of the 30 channels by moving the rotary switch in combination with the antenna position. In other words, there were 600 ways to get the two channels!

In those days, monkeys and I-spy playing kids would roam the terraces quite freely and once in a while, pull the cord or rotate the antenna by mistake and that would send the adults cursing.

The men would blame the kids when they saw Sunil Gavaskar launch into what could have been a "glorious cover drive" only to be suddenly replaced by millions of teeming black and white insects on the screen matched by a bzzzzzzzzzzzz sound!

"indha pasangalaaaa..."(these boyyyyys...) would come a menacing scream from the menfolk, only to be nullified by "nethu mandhi korangu mottai maadikku vandudhu nna! adhu dhan antennava thirupi irukkum" (yesterday a big male monkey came to the terrace with his harem. he must have moved the antenna) from the ladies concerned for their kids back!

The elders would quickly quiet down, because in their hearts, they knew!

They knew that getting that picture back in time to see the action replay of that shot and determining if the ball made it to cover or the slip cordon, was a two person job. A kid willing to swing the antenna on the terrace and a person twiddling the dial on the ground. So the little one(usually me) would be dispatched to the top.

Konjam left..

Konjam right..

go back..

and the directions would be relayed through an open window and like a sailor navigating a boat on a rocky sea to 1/2 degree precision, the antenna would be returned to its rightful position. The smarter kids who knew that this nuisance would haunt them for years, what with real monkeys roaming the terrace and all, would leave pencil or chalk marks to align the pole to the parapet wall, only to realize that it really didn't matter.

Gavaskar, was out! and bringing back that picture was as good as bringing in a telegram into the house that read "Gavaskar Dead. Stop. Mourn Immediately. Stop. Gory action replay to follow. Stop."

The antenna saga went on for almost a decade before the now ubiquitous remote even appeared on the scene.

Now, we just take it for granted!

Just for the fun of it, I should send Jr. and the little one to climb on the roof of our house every now and then and adjust a fake antenna.. Just for the fun of it, Gavaskar or otherwise.

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