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Entries in mottai (7)

Thursday
May072020

Mottai - Do it yourself.. well almost

First it was a Samosa- Do it yourself.. 

now it is a mottai.. I simply could not handle the wet hair post yoga. Started getting migraines last three days. Decided enough was enough. Hair Focus, the salon I have been going to for 18 years is not opening anytime soon.. so this is it. 

Jr. the budding nurse, who will have to eventually learn to shave using something like this eventually got some practice ahead of time..

The little one is not looking at me.. San and MIL think I went over the top..  Jr. is happy with her handiwork. 

Me, just relieved!

 

Monday
Nov252019

Faith Faith Faith

Faith is an interesting thing.. it makes you do things that are ingrained in you from childhood. Everytime I lose something and I have to find it in a time sensitive way, subconsciously say a prayer to Ganesha and say "will light a camphor light(karpooram) for 10 paise at the local temple".. 

a. we don't get camphor lights in the US that easily

b. there is no 10 paise anymore

c. local temple can be anything but was originally intended for Vembadi Vinayagar, a little ganesha under a pipal tree that I have circled with prayers to remove obstacles real and imaginary..

But it gets done.. and we are not even talking about if we actually found the thing on time or not.

In 2014 my MIL was going for a bone marrow test and in pure panic mode I prayed to my family deity (Gunaseelam perumal) that if the test came negative for cancer, will go shave my head in the temple. That was more of an extreme case of the camphor lighting thing.. 

Have made at least 6 trips to India since that time but never got the opportunity to go visit Gunaseelam. Faith is interesting.. seeing your family deity is not up to you, it is up to your deity.. or so the saying goes! Guess on this short trip to see my dad, there was no agenda. 

Three weeks ago, was lying in a hospital bed myself, dreading some worse case scenarios, which fortunately turned out to be something a lot less threatening. While there, the thought of unfinished business with god somehow bubbled up to the top of the already buffering thought process.  What if I died and did not do the "mottai"? After all the bone marrow test for MIL had come out negative! 

The original plan was to just go alone with a driver and get things done and get back. Then my parents said the words "Can we come with you?".. In case you didn't get the reason Faith got mentioned three times in the title, "you cannot say no to someone when they ask to come to a temple with you".. My dad was bedridden two weeks ago and he barely started walking again. An adult in diapers who just started walking, coming on a day trip where we spend 11 hours in the car and 3 hours in a temple is no joke. 

Somehow, we told ourselves, if it was meant to be, we will make it. I did a risk mitigation plan that would make any project manager proud and we left at 3AM. It was still raininig in Chennai but we were off to a flying start.. We had one stop for 25 minutes and were back on the road. 

Given this is my n'th mottai at Gunaseelam, the whole thing was done in 7 minutes.. then came the best part. There was water in the river that flows to the temple! Had a great time taking a dip in the river and have the fishes nibble at me. We were on a deadline and I had to pull myself out of the water to go in and finish the rest of the prayer. 

Our driver and some total strangers helped me navigate a wheel chair through the temple. The priest knows our family and was extremely nice and made sure my dad got to see the deity up close. 

On our way out a puppy came up and lay down under our vehicle. This one knew how to put on a sad face like a pro..

It was time to drive back. My dad is like a kid who just got his tonsils out and knows that his parents won't say "no" to anything... we just got out of the temple and he mumbles "elaneer.. I want elaneer". He wanted coconut water. Was not even sure if this is coconut water season and we were watching the road for it and sure enough we found a vendor selling fresh coconut water. It is not a good idea for a person of his age to drink that instead of lunch. We stopped at an A2B for lunch and it was really delicious. Had a full course meal. As an added bonus this place had a wheelchair ramp!

Then came the bombshell from my dad "I want to use the restroom". That was not part of the plan. It was going to be diapers all the way. But a kid without his tonsils... is a kid without his tonsils. The restrooms here are not typically wheelchair accessible. They are simply not for anyone who is not fit and can manoeuvre around a potty, a door that swishes past the potty with millimeter tolerance and a bunch of taps and buckets on the floor that are trip hazards. In what can only be described as a houdini move, managed to get my kid to go potty and get him diapy changed. That coconut water was a bad idea. Our driver concurred. 

The rest of the drive back was calm and serene. There were cops every 100 feet. So I started counting cops. After 270, I stopped counting. That was only on one side of the road from Dindivanam to Melmaruvaththur. My mind boggled at the efficiency of this whole security apparatus with so many cops just standing on the roadside doing nothing.. then again, maybe this system works, who knows! We actually slowed down to ask one of the cops to find out what the big deal was. He proudly answered "The Chief minister of Tamil Nadu is making his way back to Chennai on the same route!"

We made a dash for it to avoid his motorcade and made it back in exactly 14 hours. For a few minutes after reaching could not find my legs.. had let my dad doze off on me. . . which reminded me of my kids dozing off on me on another recent trip.

It has been another interesting day. 

A picture that says it all..

and a short video of the days experience.. 

It is always a great feeling taking a dip in the river.. mottai or not. Was glad to see my parents smiling again, even if for one day! 

Now the only thought in my head is "the mosquitoes are going to get me good tonight with this exposed scalp.. they will suck my brains dry and I might actually wake up smarter!"

My head feels lighter already, both literally and figuratively...

Saturday
Nov052016

Bad designs

Electric kettles seem to have one fundamental flaw! The cords are too short. Be it the one in the Chinese hotel or the ones you get at the local Target here, they all seem to have a cord that is at the most 18 inches long. 

This means the kettle has to be practically close to the wall or the thing doesn't sit on the base well. That also means that if someone has recently used it or if you are trying to unplug it before removing the vessel, the probability of getting burnt by the hot vessel or steam puffs still coming out every now and then is high!

My MIL has already gone through heat boils many times.. for me this is happening after a long time. 

This happened bright and early yesterday morning. So I skipped Yoga yesterday. Thought I would give it a shot today and by the time the class ended, the thing went from being flat and wrinkly to almost popping. Think by tomorrow's class it will pop and will get this over with. 

The body is amazing in the way it directs the recovery crew to a specific site and the hot room accelerates the process is my guess. 

and on a side note, given my recent realization that my bald spot is no longer a spot but more like a bald field, went for a new look. All the ladies in the house unanimously hate it. Have never managed to unite them like this on anything before! 

Life is full of little quirks.. for now I am happy to be blogging again! If any of you know why these kettles have such short power cords, let me know! 

Friday
Sep202013

Customs that make sense..

Recently we visited Seattle for my nieces first birthday celebration. There was a formal Hindu ceremony followed by a Western style birthday party with a cake cutting. There was a short break and the birthday girl got her head shaved off and her ears pierced! 

What shocked me was that when we went to the local hair salon, we were told that they are banned by law from using a razor to shave off the scalp of the baby! In India we do not cut the hair for the baby and the first haircut is a shave, usually done in a temple that they family prays to. There is a lot of goodness in doing this. The hair grows thicker when you are a kid and we are told that this is a tradition that dates back thousands of years. 

Pretty sure some western scientists would have "studied" this in their way to come to a conclusion on hair growth rate, density, eventual impact on long term hair loss, does this apply to male pattern baldness etc. etc. Many Ph.D's have possibly been generated, for all we know!

Why ban this is beyond me! The birthday girl brought back so many memories for me as she looks a lot like our little ones, especially Jr. when she was the same age!

The photographs below are Jr. at 10 months, the little one at 8 months, my niece on her first birthday all on the day of their Mottai's !

They are all soo adorable! Sometimes I wish to bottle up my kids and freeze them at that age. 

At least we have the old photos and videos to replay those moments and enjoy!

Here are some of the old and new photos..

Jr's mottai in Gunaseelam Temple near Trichy in Tamil Nadu 2003! We had gone there as a family to pray there after my brother's wedding. She is sitting on his lap and my dad was very happy that his kids were all there in one place after many years!

Look at the size of the mosquito bites on Jr.! That was and is her only complaint when we mention "India trip"!

The little one had two.. one here at 8 months and one in India in the summer vacation when she was five!

The first one was a shave but not with a razor everywhere. I did it for her after the hair salon did a #1 cut. We did put the hair in the temple almost five years later. The thing sat in a ziploc bag for all those years!

The second time she was the star of the show. 

This is something that all kids get, both girls and boys. The boys more often.. I remember my brother and myself getting head shaved off 4 times when we were little kids, almost every alternate year! Here is a picture on one of those India trips where my nephew is sporting "the look". The kids were all troubling me that day for a pose!

Now to the latest diva, my niece! 

She was amazing. Sat there so peacefully and watched her hair fall. Think she was relieved to see it go! 

and here she is with Jr. after she got the earring!

The little one wants a second set of earings after watching her cousin get new earings..

We are now searching for an old photo where my father, me, my brother and sister are all sporting a clean shaved head after a temple visit! Will post it if we find it...

Sunday
Sep122010

We just cannot wait...


Found the little one walking around the house like this today.

Rubber bands, hair clips, fake dangling clip on earrings to match pink fake hair..

Kept saying to myself "God, what have we done! She is brave on the outside but inside she does feel the lack of hair!"

Well, it was a one time deal and it will be forgotten in a month. We can already put a clip through the hair.

Had a heart to heart with the girl and she is okay. Why?

"In two months my hair will be growing faster than Akka and will be longer than Akka! So I am okay. This is just pretend for now"

Now all we can pray for is that it does start to grow faster.

.