Aaalum Velum palluku urudhi

What does that mean?

(it means that your teeth get stronger if you brush it with twigs from certain trees .. Pipal/Neem to be more specific)

You see, people in the villages in south India used to use twigs from these trees to brush their teeth. Western medicine has finally caught up with the twigs and rumor has it that there are neem farms in Florida where medical research is coming up with neem extracts for curing gum diseases. Now, that is one instance of a natural product that helps dental care. But there are other issues with this.

I tried brushing with a neem branch when I was 5 or 6 years old and did more damage to my teeth than good! While the chemicals in the neem twig are medicinal, twigs are pretty rough on the teeth and gums. Colgate and Binaca toothpaste (or Margo Neem soap for that matter) made it the best of both worlds! As you have probably figured out by now, this post is going to do a 270 degree turn and veer far from the neem twig freeway!

If you are a regular of this blog, you probably know that it sticks 80% to "a naturalized American from India, raising kids in the USA", "how to get the best of both worlds", "how to deal with the worst from both worlds" , etc.. and the other 20% is posts on events that affect the blogger and his family like Bailouts, Voting, travel issues etc.

By now, you have also heard me complain that there is a blatant double standard imposed on Indians who live abroad for the most part, by telling them that they have no right to say anything that could be interpreted as negative. Apparently only people who "live with the problems" can say "where is the problem?" or "we have a problem", and it is some kind of right that has been "earned"!

Now what has this got to do with "Aaalum Velum..."?

This phenomena of "you don't live here anymore, so go mind your business" is true of anyone who leaves a place to go live elsewhere, and is one of those Anthropology things for all I know, and chances are, there are detailed paragraphs in Manu sastra which tell you about this!

Sarcasm apart, my dad tells me that when their family left the village to come settle in Madras (this was 60 odd years ago), they would get the same treatment when they mentioned things like "antibiotics", western medicine (vaccinations), etc. when they went back to the villages and they would see people die of causes that had preventive cures in the City!

They would get the "aalum velum pallukku urudhi" lecture, blown to extraordinary proportions from the guys who never left the village.

It was just funny to see the problem is a universal one (the people, the settings, the issues may be different) which has nothing to do with George Bush, Oil Wars, American Capitalism, Indian culture, etc. etc. All those are just detractors used to argue the "Protectionist" logic. (If I find a good book that deals with this subject, will let you know. Worse case, when I finally retire, tired and broke, a long time from now, will write a book on this topic with the same title as this post and hopefully make some money! After all, universal topics have great readership.)

Fast forward to thirty years ago! Similar things happened to my FIL who decided to graduate from IIT Madras, and go settle in Bombay because he got a really good job there, where he felt he made a difference. He got married to a Tamizh girl, they had San while they were in Bombay and when he would come back to Madras and tell people of how things are "done differently in Bombay" and seem to work for the better, he would get a different version of "Aaalum Velum..." except this time the reasons would be tradition, Tamizh culture, lack of Agraharams in Bombay etc. etc.

Now fast forwarding to the last 13 years or so (ever since my first trip back to India after coming to the USA to study), the same thing happens to me. I get that same "you are an outsider" treatment (this has been irrespective of F1/H1B/Green Card/Citizenship). All I am allowed to do is send money to repent for making that choice to go abroad to study, then work, then raise a family, be some kind of emotional punching bag for the near and dear ones when they see all their problems, as being due to the most energetic person in the family, not being around to do all kinds of errands, from getting Pachchai Milagai from the local grocery store to standing in line for Milk coupons.

Even got a lecture once along the lines of "sundaram, viralukku eththa veekam dhan daa irukkanum.." (Sundar, a finger should only swell to the right size.). What is implied is that if one finger in a hand grows too long, then either the finger has to be cut or the whole hand is to be cut as it will become useless. The translation was, that the average family wanted me to be an average guy so I fit in. So any suggestions to change anything would be considered as a finger too long!

Things have changed a lot, now that everyone in the family has visited the USA or some other country over the years and the advent of the internet penetrating the households. These days I even get sympathy from family when people misunderstand me, things in the USA, how somehow I am responsible for all of GWB's actions, the Iraq war, rising prices etc. They somehow understand that my getting to vote and voting for Obama is taking a stand for issues! At least the ones who understand correct the ones who don't.

Us vs. Them is not a new concept. It has existed for ages, be it in the east or west or anywhere else for that matter, with a varying demographic segment!

Used to end a lot of conversations with "the world is shrinking!". Do not know if it is shrinking or just segregating into a lot of little pockets, like milk that curdles in front of your eyes or blood cells that segregate into little pockets on a slide when the CSI agent puts that special reagent on them, each drop unable to merge with its nearest neighbours*.

Do not know what my girls will go through a few decades from now. What will be the centerpoint of the argument over which they will be taking sides? What will be their choices? Will have to live and see where all this is going.

For the interim, the blogger and this blog are doing to take a resolve to increase the % of lighter side of life posts. It is better to have face to face discussions with folks.

The internet seems to be a wrong medium for a lot of topics.

See you all around!

For now, this blog takes a break from seriousness.

*In 1993, an undergrad student complained to my department head asking that I be warned for using the word "neighbour" when I corrected his Materials 101 exam! He was apparently offended by my spelling and his claim was that he was studying in an American University and he did not have to be corrected on his answer with a "British" spelling. So much for Us vs. them!

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