wife

The Yoga journey is still on

If you have been reading this blog, it has been going all over the place.. to July 2024, then finally to other things.. There are a few things that don’t get mentioned which are reasons for all the anachronistic posts.

Last summer San and me knew there was a 9 day anniversary trip. Still we had signed up for a 60 day challenge. T-shirts make you do things I guess! For me it was a no brainer. The earlier two week trip in February had made me skip signing up for the Winter 2024 challenge. I haven’t missed a winter challenge in years! So the family knew I will sign up for the summer challenge. Given a 10 day miss for travel, we started doing doubles every day in the hot July summer. The first 22 days saw us do 44 classes.. mostly back to back. San had never done doubles before, so I was really impressed and proud of her effort. Then we went on the trip and came back to finish the challenge ahead of time. It was good we finished it ahead.

Just two days before the challenge end date, my mother called me to show my dad in Apollo ICU in Chennai. The prognosis was that he would’t make it by the time I left here and reached him. It was a timely call as I was booked for a business trip first thing the next morning. Cancelled that trip and flew to India.

By some miracle, my dad went from ICU to general ward and back home in the week I spent there. The doctor’s told me that at this point, his condition is expected to be the same for weeks or months. He was home though. My mom was relieved that he was home. Even though the room became a hospital room, he had pulled through. So with happy tears I flew back. Right after coming back we did attend the 60 day challenge party. It was a great way for me to take my mind off everything. Went right back to the regular yoga routine. I was even more determined and sure that if I did this yoga regularly, there might be a quick and painless death instead of a prolonged debilitating disease. No one knows what is going to happen or when, but one can always do some preventive maintenance.

There was no blog posts .. not just about yoga.. There was simply no mood to write anything for the rest of September and most of October till my dad stabilzed to a new routine. Then we had a planned trip to the grand canyon to hike the south rim and that brought me back to Facebook , blogging and a social routine.

Went back searching for the videos of my speech from that challenge but could only find these two pics.. (one done before my dad ended up in hospital) and another from the challenge party. That was my 15th successful challenge out of 17 attempts.

Then it was January again before we knew it. This time my MIL had informed me that she will visit us from Jan to March just to join me for the 60 day challenge. She wanted to do another challenge (having done it once). The two of us had signed up and I signed up San, given she joins me most days. Initially she was hesitant and did not want to do it. She did not even do the stickers to keep track (I was keeping track for her). When there were only 10 days left and she had to do just a few doubles, she got enticed by Michele to complete. The T-shirts were back! They had the right size too apparently! All three of us finished this challenge.

My goal for this challenge was to do a 1000 classes in trying 60 day challenges. Had already done 900 in the 15 good attempts and in the two failed attempts there was another 93. So by class 7, the goal was done. Still the challenge teaches us something about how to carry on when your brain goes on strike and how to overcome adversity.

We did go to the challenge party this time and got to share the experience. You can see the video highlights reel..

One more T-shirt got added to replace the worn out ones..

After three weeks of not being able to go do Yoga much because of nosebleeds, finally made it last two days. Plan to get back to going everyday. Yoga makes me happy and peaceful. It is a reflective time and a meditative time to let go of things that don’t serve me right. It is a great way to reset.

That said, every day, learn something new. Even this morning in class Michelle tells me “Sundar, nothing should happen with the standing leg. just move the hands and the other leg!”. This was while doing a balancing stick pose where I was instinctively rolling forward on my ankle to compensate for the imbalance. Not doing that made all the difference in the second set. Have to remember that in tomorrows class. As we form good habits, bad habits have a way of creeping up as well. Constant attention to detail with a watchful set of teachers helps me fix them over and over again. To all my teachers at BYSJ, especially Michele, Matt and Sarah, who by now know my every move and even pre-emptively correct me , a heartfelt and sincere thank you!

Thank god for teachers!

The best part of this challenge was doing it with my wife and MIL. Hopefully someday, the kids will do a 60 day challenge. One can always hope.. and screw Parkinson’s disease.. Hope they find a cure for this shit so in case I do end up with it, there is some relief. Even if I cannot avoid the physical eventuality, the Yoga practice will definitely help me handle anything mentally down the road. That much I am sure of!

The "Thank you" tour

Had called to wish my dad on new years eve. He was almost 85 and in diapers and he was not liking his quality of life. That is to put it mildly. He wanted to see me. Having gone to India every three months the previous year on business trips and having spent at least a weekend with him on those trips made it appear that we were meeting "regularly". 

Since last June my roles changed and India trips were not on the agenda. So it was understanable my dad felt that way. Also my mom reminded me that there were some "vendudhals" that were not done. The family astrologer had requested that we (San and me) go together to visit the family deity in Gunaseelam soon. San and me haven't been to India together since 2019! So we decided to do a bunch of things all at once and on an impulse bought short notice tickets to fly to India for two weeks. 

Given the girls are both in college we picked a time when they will be busy with classes, to go to India. 14 days from start to finish, 3 days for the US to India travel and back.. do as much as possible in 11 days within India! 

We are coming up on our 25th wedding anniversary in 3 months. We wanted to get blessings from my parents, inlaws, family, all the gods we know and all the gods we don't know and any higher powers that be on this trip. We are not Ambanis, but think of this as our pre-anniversary celebration! 

It is a miracle that we did everything we wanted to and made it back without any sickness.  Will blog about this trip over next few weeks. Thanked the gods in every temple we visited, for giving me San in this life.

If my life had a jingle it will be "Sundar, brought to you by Sangeetha!". Somehow this girl I had just met, took a huge chance on me knowing I was a basketcase, and decided to make something of a life for both of us.

Did pray for all my family and friends as well, every chance I got. 

Jr. called me to say "don't over pray or the gods will get bored!".  That didn't stop me!

Jotting down our trip stops in this post, as a memory marker to write subsequent posts.. Eventually will link all of them here.. 

Day 1 (in India) : Land in Mumbai and within 3 hours visit Mahalakshmi, Siddhi Vinayak

Day 2: Chedda Nagar Murugan temple Abhishegam (highlight 1)

Day 3: spent shopping and eating out!

Day 4: fly to Chennai

Day 5: Kapaleeshwar temple, valeeswarar, Saradhambal temple, Vembadi vinayagar

Day 6 : train to Rameshwaram

Day 7: Ramanadhaswamy temple and bath in the 22 wells (trip highlight 2), Ramar padam, Panchamukha Hanuman temple, Lakshmana theertham, Thiruppulaani, Uttarakosamangai and off to Madurai

Day 8: Meenakshi Amman temple, Koodal Azhagar, Noopura gangai, Pazhamudhir Solai temple, Kalazhaghar, Thiruparangundram, Thiruperundhurai Aavudaiyaar kovil, Pudukkottai Bhuvaneshwari amman temple and off to Trichy

Day 9: Sreeranganathar, Jambulingeshwarar, Gunaseelam Perumal (this was the 3rd and biggest trip highlight), Thirupaanjali Siva-Yaman temple, Thiruvellarai temple, Uttamar kovil and off to Tanjore with a stop at the Palace museum and Brighadeeswara temple (Tanjavoor Periya kovil) and off by train to Thrissur

Day 10 : Vadakkumnathan temple, Thiruvambady Krishna temple, then to Guruvayoor temple, Maamiyur Shiva Vishnu temple then drive to Cochin and fly back to Mumbai

Day 11 : Santoshi Maa temple in Chembur and a movie with San in the evening (Fighter.. meh!)

Day 12 : Juma Hanuman temple, Saradhambaal temple, Lakshmi Narasimhar temple (Ahobila mutt's) all in Chembur followed by two back to back movies (my in-laws live right next to a movie theater complex.. we can walk down and it is there!! and the theaters are mostly empty!).. DUNE 2 and Laapata Ladies which we loved.

Day 13 : pack and Visit Jio world Plaza and take off early the following morning from Mumbai to SFO with a layover in BLR

Hopefully have mentioned all the major places where we stopped. 

We fell at my parents feet for blessings and my dad who seems to be floating in space and time and he blessed us saying "now that you are married, may you have a child.. a boy!". My mom smiled and said "let it go".. she knows my take on the "boy child" blessing. I usually burn people to ashes (or try to) with my gaze when folks in India make this an issue with not having boys.  My dad is past all that. So it was easy to let it go. All that yoga has really helped. We made it to see him, even if for a few hours to wish him for his 85th birthday. It was a short and sweet flying visit. 

Grateful to all the higher powers for giving us two wonderful kids and did make it a point to say thanks. 

We do not know when we will visit India.. it might not happen anytime soon given work trajectories and kids getting busier in college. 

There is a saying "you don't get to see god when you want to.. you get to see them if they want to see you!" 

If I had to look for a highlight photo of this trip.. this is it.. Photo on the left is the first ever portrait we took together at a JC Penny a few months after we were married. Photo on right taken by San's mama at Murugan temple in Mumbai.. San gets prettier by the day (she wore the same Sari after ~25 years to make the point)

There are almost 1400 photos and videos in total to cull through and write about. For once I did't even take my SLR on the trip. Everything on the iPhone where photos were allowed.  Will get to it..

A special 60 day yoga challenge

Folks who read this blog and know me or even randomly see me on the street (pretty much all of Cupertino) know:

- There is a Bikram Yoga San Jose

- There is something called a 60 day challenge at BYSJ

- and "I did it!"

They might also have concluded that I have only one shirt in my entire wardrobe and wear it all the time, possibly due to some psychological disorder where I have to wear the same shirt.

A more astute observer might have noticed that the blue T-shirt has different levels of fading due to repeated washing over years and therefore, cannot be the same shirt.

This fact has been reinforced over last year, now that there are two additional colors added to the collection. 

Why do I keep wearing this shirt? 

1. It was a T-shirt not bought, but hard earned by doing 60 hot yoga classes in 60 days (miss one and you do two on another day to compensate). A 90 minute yoga class is just that, no matter how many times you have done it before (2390 to date for me, given I have a tracker) and every class is different. You go in with a different levels of physical and emotional baggage and you hopefully come out without it after the class, if you give it your all.

2. It is a really nice shirt. Great fabric. Absorbs sweat after yoga class so the car seat doesn't get the sweat and it fits me nicely. 

3. Navy blue is my favorite color. Most of my clothes are blue!

Over the years, have done 10 of these 60 day challenges. The first few years, BYSJ used to give out little Oscar like trophies. So as of now, have 4 tropies and 6 T-shirts. Have requested the Yoga studio for an exchange program so we can turn in the old trophies for T-shirts, given it is practically the only thing I wear all the time and it is good publicity for the studio and Yoga!

This was my 11th Challenge and it was very very special. My wife signed up for it!!! Why? She was trying to heal her ankle injury and was trying all kinds of things. So I told her to try to do yoga with me as it is a definitely good thing. She came for a few days, saw an improvement and decided to sign up for the 60 day challenge. She was okay with me signing up as well. We were going through a lot of stuff at home and doing any activity with my wife on a regular basis usually ends up being challenging. So I was hesitant at first.

Then I got used to doing Yoga with my wife. Initially I would always try to look back at her in the second row to see if she is overdoing some poses or she is messing up Vajrasana which is great for ankles but only if done right. Then my teachers would all go help her do it right in the first 10 days. We would also plan and try to schedule classes together and it ended up being fun.

We both finished the challenge on the same day and put stickers up. Given my OCD, my teachers saved me a stash of purple stickers in the last week, so I could have the joy of putting up stickers. My teachers and the Karma Yoga helpers at BYSJ keep laughing at me for my sticker anxiety. I had 6 stickers left to place and they were running out of purple stickers. So I went and told them, "this is like doing a 1000 piece jigsaw puzzle to find out that you are missing the last piece".  They understood. Next year I have been asked to change colors for stickers every 5 classes or so, try to be in different spots in the yoga room, etc.. in other words, break the routine. That might be the real challenge. As you can clearly tell, wife seems to have no such issues. Puts whatever color is available. We are very different creatures.

It has been 3 1/2 years since I stopped drinking water during class. So the 60 days of doing yoga, in studio with the heat and humidity, without water and with a mask on was interesting, but totally doable. So if any of you reading this are thinking about trying to get back into the hot room, you can do it with the mask. No problem. You will get used to it in two days.(you are allowed to drink water.. I just do this as an additional challenge and it helps me suck in my stomach more during poses)

San and me did yoga together on most days. Sometimes we had to juggle doctor appointments for the kid and would go at different times. Once San's ankle started healing and she started on baby hikes again, we still did yoga after the hikes.

There is something to be said about sweating it out and breathing with single minded focus. My job has not been a cake walk for the last three months. It is more me than the job. Going from being in startups for 15 years to a big company takes some adjusting to. Things that take hours takes weeks, things that take weeks take quarters. All that fire and drive from startup life, hits a concrete wall of layered bureaucracy and quicksand like interactions. It takes some time to recalibrate oneself to the new normal, but I have learned to take enough deep breaths and have fun in the new enviorns. The 60 day challenge definitely helped in this process.

This was taken after finishing 60. Really happy for San as she finished this! For once she gets to talk about the challenge at the 60 day challenge party while I get to cheer her!

My teachers are amazing! They push me, correct me, know exactly when I am about to give up and give me that look that says "how dare you?" at just the right time to keep me going. Forever grateful to them for making me a better person on a daily basis. 

My MIL has wanted to do this challenge with me for 10 years, but never found the time on her travel schedule. Very happy that my wife did yoga with me for a couple of months and thrilled to see her do a 60 day challenge. Hopefully she starts doing Yoga more regularly and comes with me at least a few times a week. It is also my hope that my MIL will also get to finish this challenge in the coming years. 

A very happy Teachers day to all my yoga teachers and all my teachers!! 

BYSJ is a very very special place. It is truly a home away from home. It is a place where you can go in with a lot of issues and come out feeling a lot better than you went in. No other place of exercise, no hospital or temple has beat that for me yet! Watching my wife or kids smile is a close second. A long trip or hike in nature or watching the sunset over the pacifica, is a distant third!

Looking forward to getting a new T-shirt to add to the collection. Now I have one for every day of the week!